“His eyes seemed to be popping out of his head. He wasn’t certain if this was because they were trying to see more clearly, or if they simply wanted to leave at this point.”
Douglas Adams
“There was a point to this story, but it has temporarily escaped the chronicler’s mind.”
Douglas Adams
“Ford carried on counting quietly. This is about the most aggressive thing you can do to a computer, the equivalent of going up to a human being and saying Blood… blood… blood… blood…”
Douglas Adams
“The major difference between a thing that might go wrong and a thing that cannot possibly go wrong is that when a thing that cannot possibly go wrong goes wrong it usually turns out to be impossible to get at or repair.”
Douglas Adams
“No, that’s just perfectly normal paranoia. Everyone in the Universe has that.”
Douglas Adams
“Mark turned and asked a passenger behind us if these planes ever crashed. Oh yes, he was told, but not to worry – there hadn’t been a serious crash now in months.”
Douglas Adams
“Virtually everything we were told in Indonesia turned out not to be true, sometimes almost immediately. The only exception to this was when we were told that something would happen immediately, in which case it turned out not to be true over an extended period of time.”
Douglas Adams
“There is a theory which states that if ever anybody discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another theory which states that this has already happened.”
Douglas Adams
“The best way to get a drink out of a Vogon is to stick your finger down his throat.”
Douglas Adams
“And wow! Hey! What’s this thing coming towards me very fast? Very very fast. So big and flat and round, it needs a big wide sounding word like… ow… ound… round… ground! That’s it! That’s a good name – ground! I wonder if it will be friends with me.”
Douglas Adams
“In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.”
Douglas Adams
“I am so amazingly cool you could keep a side of meat in me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis.”
Douglas Adams
“Ford grabbed him by the lapels of his dressing gown and spoke to him as slowly and distinctly and patiently as if he were somebody from a telephone company accounts department.”
Douglas Adams
“(Arthur) leapt to his feet like an author hearing the phone ring.”
Douglas Adams
“Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.”
Douglas Adams
“Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner.”
Douglas Adams
“I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.”
Douglas Adams
“It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.”
Douglas Adams
“The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.”
Douglas Adams